I know you are hurting inside out but I need you to keep on holding.
Please. Just hold on for a little bit longer. Can you do that for me Granny?
I acknowledge that this is a very selfish thing to ask from you
but I need to see you once last time.
I need to hug you tight and tell you how much I love you.
And I know you will be staring back at me
with your eyes tearing up and wanting to say it back.
You will open your mouth and your voice will fail
but hey, it is okay. I know you do too.
I have always known because your acts of pure kindness
have showed me that
since the very first moment I opened my eyes to this world.
The problem is that you have always had a too big of a heart
You shared it with so many people
That you are now left with so little of it for yourself.
I feel angry, sad and hopeless.
After all, I have known you for all my life
and I just can’t bear the thought of having to learn to live a life
where you are no longer part of it.
I know your heart is weak and your breath is failing
I know your mind just wants to leave your physical body
And I can only imagine your pain.
The pain of being in a body that refuses to cope with your mind
I can’t blame you for wanting to leave and go meet grandpa
But I need you to keep on fighting
because soon I will be home to hold your hand
whilst whispering how lucky I am to (still) have you.
So please, please Granny, just hold on for a little bit longer.
When I went home a couple of months ago, mum gave me some of the plums she picked up from your backyard. Just like how I remembered them to be: vivid purple colour, big, sweet and so juicy. I ate them with so much appreciation, gratitude and nostalgia. And you know what? They tasted like my childhood and I just wish the taste could last forever because it reminds me of you, my dear Granny.
Time is the most precious gift you can give to someone. — Gloria Tesch